Hiding in the ditch would have been easy for a normal grave robber making off with articles stolen from a grave.
But this was Entropy Deepwater, and his ratio of successful to unsuccessful grave robbing attempts was exactly 0 to 21.
Cold and miserable, he lay clutching a small satchel of gold teeth he’d pried from Old Lady Granchman’s toughened old beak, trying to be very still.
“Okay, Entropy, you kin come out. I seen ya,” said Constable Grievous Shlank, shining a huge spotlight into the ditch from the comfort of his 49 Plymouth police cruiser.
“No you never!” yelled Entropy.
“Don’t make me get outta my car, Entropy,” said Shlank, pulling up the tab on his styrofoam coffee cup as the rain pitter-pattered on the hood. “Got an extra coffee for ya.”
After a few moments, Entropy resignedly got up and trudged over to the car with his satchel, getting in on the passenger’s side. He moodily grabbed his coffee, sipping it slowly to warm up.
Shlank drove back into the cemetery, where Entropy dug the old lady back up and put her teeth back in, and then covered her up again. Not a single word was spoken between them.
Shlank then drove to Entropy’s house and dropped him off.
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“See you tomorrow night?” said Shlank.
“No you won’t,” retorted Entropy.
“Awright, then,” said Shlank.
“Whatever,” said Entropy.
“I’d like your permission to call on your mother one day if you say it’s okay.” said Shlank.
“Whatever,” said Entropy.
“Awright, then,” said Shlank. “Have a good night.”
Entropy watched the tail fins disappear into the night. He’d never fall asleep now that he’d had that coffee.