- I just swallowed 14 packs of Hubba Bubba chewing gum on a dare, just to see what would happen? Anyway, I think I just started farting gum bubbles.
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- I just sneezed so hard that my taint shot out onto the sidewalk.
- The voices are back, but now they’re talking in Swedish.
- I think I might be a Dracula.
- I’ve been trapped in the fridge for 3 days. I’ve been holding my breath but now there’s nothing left to eat, and the Pizza place won’t deliver anymore because I keep not being able to answer the door.
- The séance has gone horribly wrong. The Wendigo is real. Is there an ambulance you can send that also has exorcists?
- Squirrels.
- Just to say ‘I love you’.
- I’m just wondering whether eyebrows can be reattached?
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